Community Engagement Agreement

Show Up

Be present in conversations/actions/dialogues as much as you can. A community is best served by having members of that community engaged.
Show people that you’re listening and tracking what they’re saying.
If you feel you are not being heard, let that be known.
Remember that we are all showing up as much as we can in any given situation. Sometimes, we have 100% of ourselves to give. Sometimes we just don’t. Bring what you have.

Listen Actively

Listen to understand what the other person is saying. If you need time to think of a response, wait until they’ve finished speaking and ask for it. Make room for everyone at the table to be heard and understood. Including yourself.
Be aware of tendencies to tune out what others are saying in order to prepare a response, which can simultaneously negate their words and lose information.
Abandon the need to be “right,” jamming up conversation in order to prove your point. Silent self satisfaction shall suffice.
Be aware of tendencies or impulses to control or steer conversations and interactions in which you are not the initiator or moderator.
Be willing to hear “NO”. Be willing and open to rejection. If you notice that you become very defensive when someone says “no,” what is that defensiveness trying to say to you?
Just as you’re a full, dynamic, complex, and important human being with thoughts, opinions, and feelings, so is everyone else. Be willing to hear opposing opinions.

Practice Self Awareness

Be aware of your effect on a space, groups, and individuals.
A great portion of human communication is non-verbal. We have facial expressions, body postures, and very subtle ways of movement that are constantly communicating with other people. These things tell everyone around us a lot more about us than we think they do. By being aware of our body, we can avoid accidentally communicating something we don’t mean to.
Be aware of perceived intentions in text interactions, both in how they come across and how they come across to you.
Be specific when making requests of another person, it’s incredibly helpful. Being specific in our requests means that the other person is far more likely to understand what you need. By owning our part in a conversation, we give space for the other person to do it, too.
Check your intentions when having a conversation with someone. What are you trying to understand? How are you trying to be understood? What are you looking for? Knowing what your point is can help you stay with it.

Allow Space

Lead with empathy.
We are all individuals with individual histories, that result in myriad points of view.
Acknowledge privileges you may hold, and that everyone does not hold those same privileges. Rather than using them as an all access pass, use them to help others gain entry to resources and experiences they might not otherwise be able to access, or even know about.
Information hoarding is a system by which we deny access to others in order to maintain resources for ourselves and is rooted in patriarchy, bigotry and colonialist structures. Sharing information activates an inclusive space.
Make space for traditionally overlooked voices, such as BIPOC, LGBTQIA+, and Latinx contributions and engage with them to foster growth as an ensemble.
Refrain from offering advice unless asked, don’t belittle or undermine someone’s feelings, and have your solid, firm, and flexible boundaries in place.
Conflict happens. Doing all we can to avoid conflict can often lead to some very deep feelings of resentment and feeling unheard or unimportant. We’re far more likely to have a much bigger fight by holding it all in until we burst.
Remember that anger is a secondary emotion, which means there are probably a few primary emotions lurking under the surface. Usually, those primary emotions are related to fear. It isn’t to say that our anger isn’t valid, but perhaps to actually underscore that. Anger has a place. So does conflict. Embracing it as part of how we do stuff means that it doesn’t have to take up quite so much space in your box of fears.

Be Accountable

You are responsible for your words and actions.
You’re also responsible for your reactions.
Be aware of your own past unique experiences that might cause unintended reactionary thoughts and actions.
Practice consent. Respect the boundaries of others and maintain your own personal boundaries.
Words and actions constituting harassment in any form, including sexual harassment, which includes sexual violence consistent with all local, state, and federal laws shall not be tolerated.
Discrimination of any sort, including but not limited to race, colour, sex, gender, ability, and religion shall not be tolerated.